Friday, April 13, 2012

On we go.....

Graduate school is a funny, between now and Wednesday I have to write a 6 page paper, a 20 page draft for a term paper, and grade a stack of midterms. A year ago I would have felt slightly overwhelmed, but hopeful, determined, ready to climb that mountain! At the end of year two..... meh? It'll get done. No big deal. Somehow.

Usually, yes- but not today

I really am satisfied with what I've done here at State, but its weird to think I'm in closing in on the home stretch. Next semester I take my comps and then that's it, on to the next thing. I need to get on that, researching PhD programs, applying, etc. I want to go back to Davis- I love the school, the faculty, and the area. 

Remember this?
 I seriously look at this stack now and think  "cool, light load'.

The fact is a lot of the time I struggle with a great deal of self doubt. At times its downright crushing. I can be an absolute, vicious brutal bitch to myself. Its not exactly a good motivator, and I need to overcome it. Especially since school makes me feel so good about myself. When I started this program, I felt so overwhelmed. Last year was kind of like how I hear law school described- break you down and build you up again. But by the end of it I had come out feeling on top, like I was really good at this and headed in the right direction. I just need to keep pushing myself. 

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